Jul 25 2008
Remake central again
Remake central again.
Disturbing news today, I’ve heard three films that are ridiculously going to be remade and I’m going to discuss them in order so the can of the ridiculous gets so warm we can partake in the stew. First is the very celebrated John Travolta/Oliva Newton-John musical GREASE. This film takes place in the nineteen fifties and was filmed in the late seventies. The film is old enough to begin with rehash something everybody is familiar with. This is a stupid idea.
The second film is actually on one of my all time scariest films list: NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET. This is very disappointing to me because of the fact that the original was just so scary and the many spawned sequels kind of muted the original. However, I do feel that with the right director and maybe some savy and clever CGI work it actually might be passable. I don’t have high hopes for that film though especially after Rob Zombie’s HALLOWEEN and Michael Bay’s forgettable TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE. HALLOWEEN for example, was mean, not scary, too violent and plot-less. Zombie turned one of the most celebrated scare icons into a hulking stuntman that killed people because his Mommy was a stripper. What the hell? Zombie’s script was confusing even with the timeline, when you watch a film, and it’s a period piece yet you don’t know what time period your in…that’s bad. And if you rewind that film Mr. Zombie, three women in that film were all killed the exact same way (crawling on the floor trying to escape Michael Meyers), so much for originality.
The third and final film I just heard was going to be remade is a shocker!
The most celebrated, cult film of all time is going to get an update: THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW! Love it or hate it this film has beaten all odds of going away into a film vault. Usually on Halloween of every year at midnight this film is playing. It’s a ritual for some fans and a religion for others. THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW was it’s own fan club, DVD’s, CD’s and live stage show. Remaking this film with a Zak Ephron(only an example) and a Miley Cyrus is a very dangerous and stupid idea. There is a reason why this film has survived and has been replayed in THEATERS, not just television, but in theaters and that is because people cherish it. Trying to update, rewrite and re-polish something that works is a big folly.
So get ready film puritans for giant cloud of disappointments when these gems hit theaters. The most insulting thing more than remaking some of these classic films is now, when you talk about one of these films, you have to constantly CLARIFY which film you are talking about: remake or original?
